What I’ve not been able to say

Coming here and trying to blog has been getting increasingly harder, especially throughout last year as it was the hardest we’ve faced in a good few years, and my depression was getting worse and worse.

Then on the 9th October, 7 years after she adopted our bus and our family, we discovered that the Princess had a very aggressive lymphoma. She lasted exactly a month before I had to make the painful decision of stopping her pain and saying goodbye.

I’ve struggled to say goodbye out loud. I told her how much I loved her many many times in the last few weeks, as she snuggled up next to my pillow, slowly getting weaker. And every time I think of her, which is daily, I tell her again.

But saying goodbye is much harder. My heart is broken. And I sit here typing this 4 months on from her passing, all the pain and tears come flooding back.

I had her cremated and she'll stay with me, alongside Twiggy. In life wherever I went they went, and I won't allow that to change.

Goodbye, my love.